International Men’s Days is the designated date for petty grievances about men in general. The bros. The dudes. The hombres. The moids. The males.
Sometimes a caveat is given: we’ll make an exception for trans men. Non-binary people are on thin ice. But nobody else gets a pass, oh no, today, if it says M, it must be reminded not to celebrate too hard. It must be reminded that as an individual, it is guilty of the crimes of its gender.
Nothing has made the arbitrariness of the taxonomy of gender so obvious and so absurd than to witness first-hand the difference in treatment as a survivor of child rape before and after coming out. It’s night and day. Nobody, after coming out, dared to insinuate child rape had corrective qualities in teaching me how to be a feminist.
When i see negativity about men today, it doesn’t attack the patriarchy as a big bad evil, it doesn’t attack misogynists who go out of their way to harm people, it harms individuals a lot like me, who deal in silence.
And let’s be real: online, what sort of men find my presence interesting? In general, those who are the least aligned with masculinity. Those who were denied their man card. The gays, the furries, the neurodivergent, the long-haired linux nerds. Those who display a serious apathy for what it means to be a man: it was all decided in their stead.
I wish them a grand day.